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180 Jokes for the Classroom

August 31, 2021 by Christopher Olson




Knock, Knock!?  (Who’s there?)  Jokes!  (Jokes who?)  180 JOKES FOR THE CLASSROOM THAT’S WHO!

Alright, so I promise the following 180 jokes are WAY BETTER than that.  I mean, would you even call that a joke?  I digress…  so where did this idea come from to compile this major list of jokes?  Teaching during the pandemic. I was teaching completely virtual for almost the entire school year.  I had to find a way to motivate my students and keep them engaged and smiling when they signed on every morning.  What better way than to have an entire “joke month” with a joke of the day.  We called it “Joke January!”

I created google slides with my jokes and Bitmoji characters in various funny positions.  Also, to make it even more engaging and exciting I had a student assigned each day to tell a joke as well!  I even made a point to include several of their jokes within this list!  My plan for this upcoming school year is to do an entire year’s worth of jokes!

Here is my plan for the upcoming school year: When the jokes are presented to my students on the slide,  I will provide time for students to read the joke on their own first.  Some days I have them pair and share what they think the answer may be.  Or, I will complete it whole group with several students taking guesses before providing the answer.  I hope this will start the day with a smile!

Thank You!

A huge thank you to several of my former students for some of these hilarious jokes!  Also, a big thank you to the Teaching Trailblazers in our Fearless Kindergarten Facebook Group, Fearless First Grade Facebook Group, and Fearless Second Grade Facebook Group for funny jokes in the classroom!   Sit back, relax and enjoy these 180 Jokes for the Classroom!  I can’t stop laughing at the Cow and Dinosaur sections!

School

1 – Which school supply is the king of the classroom?

          The ruler

2 – What runs around the yard (or playground) all day, but never gets tired?

          The fence.     ~ Peggy H. 

3 – Why did the teacher have to wear sunglasses?
          Her students were so bright.     ~ Anita C. 

4 – What is a snake’s favorite subject?

         Hisssssstory

Joke 5 – Why did the crayon cry?

         He was feeling blue.

6 – Where do pencils go on vacation?

         Pennsylvania     ~ Carrie B. 

7 – Why did the dog do so well in school?

         Because he was the teacher’s pet! 

8 – Why did the kid cross the playground?
          To get to the other slide.

9 – How do bee parents send their little bees to school?

          They go by school buzz.

Joke 10 – Why was the broom late for school?

          It overswept!

Even MORE School Jokes

11 – How do you get Pikachu on the bus? 

          You Poke-e-mon (poke him on).     ~ Cherie M. 

12 – What do elves do after school?

          GNOME-work

13 – What is a cat’s favorite color crayon?

          ”Purr”ple

14 – I just can’t remember all the letters of the alphabet…
           I don’t know why!     ~ Steve T. 

Joke 15 – What flies around the kindergarten room at night?

          The alpha-BAT.

16 – What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?

          A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”

17 – What did the paper say to the pencil?  

          You have a good point!     ~Serina W. 

18 – Why was the music teacher stuck outside his classroom?

          Because his keys were on the piano!

19 – What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

          Supplies!

Joke 20 – Why did the students eat their homework?
          Because the teacher told them that it was a piece of cake.

21 – Did I tell you the joke about the broken pencil?

          Response: no

          Well, there’s no point.     ~ Serina W. 

Math

22 – What are ten things you can always count on?

          Your fingers!

23 – What do you call a hen who counts her own eggs?

          A mathemachicken.        ~ Kelly R.

24 – What did the circle say to the triangle?
          I don’t see your point.

Joke 25 – What was the banker’s favorite player on the football team?

          The quarterback.

26 – What did 50 do when she got hungry?

          58     ~ Anna W. 

27 – Why is a math book always unhappy?

          Because it always has lots of problems.

28 – What is a mathematician’s favorite day of the week? 

          Tuesday, because it has a “number” in it. TWOsday.     ~ Letitia B. 

29 – How do you make seven an even number?
          By removing the ‘S’

Joke 30 – When is it time to go to the dentist?

          Two-thirty! (Tooth-hurty).     ~ Julie B. 

31 – What has hands but can’t clap?

          A clock!

32 – Why is 6 afraid of 7? 

          Because 7-8(ate)-9     ~ Tenna T.

33 – There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. 

          Only a fraction of you will get this.

34 – What did the 0 say to the 8? 

          Nice belt!     ~ Sherie T.  

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Joke 35 – Which tool do you use for math?
          MultiPLIERS!

36 – What happened when 50 ran a race?

          51     ~ Anna W. 

37 – What did one penny say to the other penny? 

          We make cents!  

38 – What do you call an empty parrot cage?
          A polygon.

Science 

39 – What’s a tornado’s favorite game to play?

          Twister. 

The perfect Science Resource that covers Weather and Seasons with hands on activities! Also includes vocabulary, anchor charts, booklets and so much more!

Joke 40 – What does the cloud put on before the storm? 

          Thunderpants.     ~ Michele J. 

41 – Why is the moon like a dollar?

          Because it has four quarters

42 – How does a scientist freshen his breath?
          With experi-mints!

43 – What kind of flower grows between your nose and your chin?

          Two lips     ~ Candice W. 

44 – Which planet is the noisiest?

          Saturn, because it has so many rings!

Seasonal

Halloween

Joke 45 – What is a vampire’s favorite fruit? 

          A neck-terine     ~ Sandy P.

46 – What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
          Spelling

47 – What is a ghost’s favorite pie?

          Boo berry pie     ~ Peggy H. 

48 – What do Italian ghosts have for dinner?

          Spook-hetti!

49 – Where do monsters get an education?

          In ghoul school!

Thanksgiving 

Joke 50 – Why did the turkey join a band?
          So he could use his drumsticks

51 – If April showers bring May flowers what do May flowers bring? 

          Pilgrims!     ~ Judy R. 

Winter/Christmas

52 – What did one snowman say to the other snowman?

          I smell carrots.     ~ Deborah P. 

53 – What do you get if you cross a vampire and a snowman?

          Frostbite

Take a trip Around The World alongside your Winter and Holiday Jokes!
54 – What do elves learn in school?
          The elf-abet

Joke 55 – What often falls in winter, but never gets hurt?
          Snow

56 – What type of Mexican food do snowmen like?

         Brrrrrr-itos!

57 – What is a snowman’s favorite drink?

          Ice Tea

58 – What treat should you make for the Snowman Holiday Party?

          Ice Krispy Treats

59 – What do they sell at McDonald’s at the North Pole?
          Brrrrrrr-gers!  

Joke 60 – What does Santa do at football games?

          He gives a little cheer!

 

Valentine’s Day

61 – What kind of flower do you never want to get on Valentine’s Day? 

          Cauliflower

62 – What do you call two birds in love? 

          Tweet-hearts

63 – What did the calculator say to the other calculator on Valentine’s Day?
          Let me count the ways I love you.

Food 

64 – What is a frog’s favorite drink? 

          Croak-a-cola.     ~ Jennifer M. 

Joke 65 – What do you give a sick lemon?

          Lemon-aid.

66 – What do you call a sad strawberry?

          A blueberry

67 – Why did the banana go to the Doctor?

          Because it wasn’t peeling well!

68 – What do you call a fake noodle?
          An im-pasta     ~ Heather G. 

69 – Why did the banana go to the hospital?

          He was peeling really bad.

Joke 70 – What day of the week does the potato look forward to the least?

          Fry-day

71 – What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you?

          Nacho cheese!     ~ Callea J. 

72 – Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?

          Because it lost its filling!

73 – What do you call a bear with no teeth? 

          A gummy bear!     ~ Susan R. 

74 – Why do eggs hate jokes?
          Because they crack up.

Joke 75 – What are twins’ favorite fruit?

          Pears

76 – What did Mr. and Mrs. Hamburger name their daughter?

          Patty!

77 – Why did the cookie go to the doctor? 

          Because he felt “crumby”     ~ Nicole O. 

78 – When potatoes have babies, what are they called?

          Tator Tots 

79 – Where do hamburgers go to dance?

          They go to the meat-ball!

Animals

Joke 80 – Why did the elephant cross the road?

          Because it was the chicken’s day off

81 – What do a car and an elephant have in common?
          They both have trunks.

82 – What color of socks do bears wear? 

          They don’t wear socks… they have bear feet (bare feet)!     ~ Jenny D. 

83 – How does a penguin build a house?

          Igloos it together!     ~ GiAnna D. 

84 – Two giraffes run a race. 

          They are neck and neck.     ~ Rachel W. 

Joke 85 – What’s the best day for monkey business?

          The first of Ape-ril!

There is no “monkey-ing around” with this awesome Zoo Animals Printable resource! Have your students read your daily joke and read about their favorite animals!
86 – What do you call bears with no ears?
          b 

87 – What nickname do you keep for a monkey selling potato chips?

          You can call them a chipmunk!

88 – Why can’t a cheetah play hide and seek?

          Because he’s always spotted

89 – What did the buffalo say when his son went to school?

          Bison!

Joke 90 – What do you call a camel with no humps? 

          Humphrey     ~ Marion L. 

91 – What do monkey cooks wear when they are working in the kitchen?

          They wear the Ape-rons

This is a digital resource featuring Zoo Animals Reading Comprehension Passages and Questions! This resource was created for Google Classroom™ and Google Slides™. This is a great fit for students in 2nd and 3rd grade.
92 – What do you call an alligator in a vest?
          An investigator!

93 – What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine?

          A slowpoke.

94 – Which animal cheats in the exams?

          CHEATah     ~ Jaxon W.

Joke 95 – Which animal is white, black, and red all over the body?

          A little sunburnt penguin!

96 – What movies do pandas enjoy watching the most?

          They love watching the old movies because the movies are black and white!

Farm Animals

97 – What’s a rabbit’s favorite kind of music?

          Hip-hop.

98 – What did the duck say after she bought Chapstick? 
          Put it on my bill!     ~ Marcia G. 

99 – What do you call a horse that lives next door?

          Neigh-bor!

Joke 100 – What’s a frog’s favorite game?

          Hopscotch

101 – Why did the bee get married?? 

          He found his honey!     ~ Stacy P. 

102 – How do you get a mouse to smile?

          Say cheese!

103 – What’s the smartest insect around?

          The spelling bee.

104 -What do pigs get when they’re sick? 

Oink-ment!

Joke 105 – Where do sheep get a haircut?
          At the baa-baa shop!

More Animal Jokes

106 – What type of dog loves going to the groomer?

          A shampoodle

107 – What did the duck say to the clown?

          You quack me up

108 – What did one firefly say to the other?

          You glow, girl!

109 – What is a cat’s most favorite magazine?

          It is a CAT-alogue.

Joke 110 – Why couldn’t the pony sing in the choir?

          Because she was a little horse

111 – Where do dogs park their cars?
          In a barking lot.

112 – What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

          A labracadabrador.

113 – What do you call a pig that does karate?

          A pork chop

114 – There are ten cats standing on a boat. One cat jumps off the boat, how many more cats are left?

          None, because the cats were all copy cats

Joke 115 – What’s a cat’s favorite nursery rhyme?

          Three Blind Mice

116 – What did the cat say when someone stepped on its tail?
          Me-OW!

117 – Why are frogs always so happy?

          They eat whatever bugs them.

Cows

118 – What do you call a cow with no legs? 

          Ground beef.     ~ Julie M. 

119 – What do you call a cow in an earthquake?

          A milkshake!     ~ Isaac G. 

Joke 120 – Where do cows go on the weekend?
          To the moo-vies

121 – How can you tell which cow is the best dancer?

          You can select the cow that has the best “mooooooooves”!

 

122 – What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

          A lawn moo-er!

123 – What does the secret agent cow say to the other agent cow before a mission?

          He says, “Are you going ‘udder cover’?”

124 – Why did the cow cross the road?

          To get to the udder side!

Joke 125 – What do you call a sleeping cow?
          A bulldozer!

Dinosaurs 

126 – What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep?

          A Stega-SNORE-us!  

127 – What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?

          Dino-SNORE     ~ Ila C. 

128 – What do you call a blind dinosaur?
          Do-you-think-he-saur-us

129 – What dinosaur should never drive a car? 

          Tyrannosaurus Wrecks!     ~ Miranda T. 

Joke 130 – When dinosaurs keep scoring touchdowns, what does its team get?

          The team will keep getting dino-scores! 

131 – When building a house, what tool do dinosaurs use the most?

          They frequently use a dino-saw

132 – What animal will you get if you combine a dog and a dino?
          You will get a Dog-A-Sore!

Space

133 – How does the solar system throw a party? 

          THEY PLANET     ~ Tanner P. 

134 – Why did Mickey Mouse become an astronaut?

          So he could visit Pluto!

Joke 135 – Where do astronauts keep their wallets?

          In air-pockets   

136 – What dance steps can cows do on the moon?
          The moooooooon walk!

137 – How did the cow jump over the moon?

          They followed the milky way. 

138 – When do student astronauts eat?

          During launch time!

Knock, Knock Jokes 

139 – Knock, knock. 

Who’s there? 

Tank. 

Tank who? 

You’re welcome!

 

Joke 140 – Knock knock?

Who’s there?

Orange

Ummm…Orange who?

Orange you glad you’re in this class!     ~ Kathy S. 

 

141 – Knock, knock. 
Who’s there? 
Cows go. 
Cows go who? 
No, silly, cows go MOO!

 

142 – Knock knock.

Who’s there? 

Cleopatra. 

Cleopatra who? 

The queen of denial.     ~ Kristin P. 

 

143 – Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Cargo. 

Cargo who?

Car go… Vroom vroom!

 

144 – Knock-knock.

Who’s there?

Justin

Justin who?

Oh, Justin time for a spelling test! 

 

Joke 145 – Knock knock
Who’s there?
Smell mop.
Smell mop who?
( you’ll get it if you say it out loud)     ~ Marv S.

Ocean

146 – What do you call a fish with no eye?

          A fsh

147 – Why are fish so smart?

          Because they are always in a school.

148 – What did the ocean say to the beach?

          Nothing, it just waved

149 – What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish?
          You get a swimming trunk!
With options like the ocean, animals, fantasy and more… check out our Directed Drawings! Volume 1 AND Volume 2!

Joke 150 – What sharks always end up working in the construction site?

          Hammerhead sharks work there because they are the most useful one!

151 – How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh out loud?

          Ten-tickles!

152 – How can you tell the ocean is friendly?

          It waves!

153 – Why did the fisherman put peanut butter into the sea?
          To go with the jellyfish! 

154 – What did they call the girl born at the beach?

          Sandy

Joke 155 – What do you get when you throw a lot of books into the ocean?

          A title wave

Pirates

156 – Have you heard about the new pirate movie?

          It’s rated Arrrrrrrrrrr.     ~ Julie B. 

157 – Why do the pirates take long to finish reading the letters of the alphabet?

          Because they spend a lot of time at C.

158 – What did the Lego pirate say when he lost his leg? 

          Where did my Lego leg go?     ~ Brenda W. 

159 – How did the pirate get his flag so cheaply?
          He bought it on sail.

Joke 160 – How much do pirates pay for body parts? 

          A buck an ear     ~ Chanda T. 

161 – What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

          Aye matey!

Miscellaneous 

162 – Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

          Because it got stuck in the crack!     ~ Amanda B. 

163 – What did the drummer name his twins? 
          Anna one
          Anna two     ~ Kendra J. 

164 – What kind of tree fits in your hand?

          A palm tree

Joke 165 – Why did the computer sneeze?

          It had a virus.

166 – What has four wheels and flies?

          A garbage truck

167 – How do you make a tissue dance?

          Put a little “boogie” in it.     ~ Lisa K. 

168 – Why did the soccer player take so long to eat dinner?
          He thought he couldn’t use his hands!

169 – Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants? 

          In case he got a hole in one.     ~ Sheryl F. 

Joke 170 – What’s the loudest pet you can get?

          A trumpet!

Wait…There’s MORE!

171 – Why is dark spelled with a K and not a C?

          Because you can’t see in the dark.

172 – Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

          Because she will Let It Go!     ~ Sue B. 

173 – What do you call a happy cowboy? 

          A jolly rancher.

174 – Why did the kids put sugar on their pillows?

          They wanted to have sweet dreams!     ~ Jenny D. 

Joke 175 – Why did the policeman go to the baseball game?

          He’d heard that someone had stolen a base!

176 – What kind of shoes do all spies wear?
          Sneak-ers.

177 – Where did the king keep his armies? 

          In his sleevies.     ~ Mary B. 

178 – What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

          A tube-a toothpaste.

179 – What did the little corn say to the mama corn?

          Where’s pop-corn?

Joke 180 – Why can’t you ever tell a joke around glass?
          It could crack up.

So I hope, now that you read 180 Jokes for School, that your cheeks don’t hurt too much from laughing/smiling!  OR, more so, I really hope you didn’t roll your eyes too much!  What were some of your favorites on this list?  Do you think you are going to be like me and have a joke of the day this upcoming school year?   Let us know in the comments below!   Even better, add your own jokes below too!   Keep laughing and keep smiling!

Written by – Christopher Olson

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